Weeheeheeheee......... the swimming session yesterday was so damn funny, i think i practically drank like one gallon of the stinky water in the pool. Well, it's all coz cher had a leg cramp in the middle of the pool and i laughed till i choked myself. After swimming like 12 laps we decided to walk across, thinking that it wasn't so deep.

So... we start walking.... then i start gasping when i reach almost the middle.. and cher being the taller one still survives.. so she starts bobbing whilst i start swimming. Then i hear.. "angie... come back and save me" so i put on my goggles.... go underwater.. see cher clasping her foot and hopping like crazy... i can't help but laugh like a hyena. gosh... the life guard was about to jump in.... then i went there, laughed and pulled her to shallow waters. I couldn't bloody stop laughing!!!!!!! then i gulped, laughed and gulped again. argh.....

Anyway we went over to watch some hockey match next door... semifinals i think.. and then i saw wai there! haha.. it's like i step in and i hear.. "angie!!!!!!" alright... it's wai!!!!! It's been ages since i last saw her. haha.. so we're going for the 12th night right? And damn.... when we were about to leave my bloody nose acted up again.... torrential flow of blood. Real crap man.. this time it was really bad.. even i got freaked out?? sheesh.. i think i've got nose cancer seriously. somebody HELP... It was like even worse than the time when we were on the plane to UK. My throat felt real parched from swallowing the blood coz i had no friggin tissue. sobs.

And sheesh.. i can't activate my damn-ed icq account. Oh yes.. anne and the class did a really fantastic job on the international friendship day poster thing.. it's looks really good, i think we might just win the first prize of something... hah. *crosses fingers*

Congrats to the cricket team!!!!!!!!!! woooooohhhoooo!!!!! the managed to clinch like.. gold. Hopefully bball will be the same today as well... i mean the whole J2 cohort is gonna be there so they better do us proud! hahaha..... and oh yeah potato... i saw the real lucas quek this morning... how do you feel........ are you sure you didn't have a long lost twin or brother or something??? OMG... he is kinda just three seats away from me now!!!!!! like HDUF?????????

Right. there are two nuts behind me trying to get the jammed paper outta the printer and another one chatting happily away on his phone... yes and anne.anne! is next to me! Oh gosh.. don't i just love..... the library!!!!!!! what's more? they provide free recycled paper which i just made use of! wheee....!!!!!!!!

Someone please bring me back down to earth.

Ahhhh..... I open my mailbox and it's FLOODED. Geez.... 83. and i don't even know half the people who sent mail to that mailbox. It's scary man.. I get mails going hey angie! enlarge your penis for free! like sure thing... if you can find it on me. *rolls eyes*

Yans in next to me trying to create her own blog. haha... we're both.. internet deprived people here. After maths lec you see the both of us rushing out to come to the library. And to our utter dismay, there are no bloody coms available. So we sepnd like one whole period looking at books in the library. No interesting people around here anyway. and hello... yans actually professed her love for *ahem* today... *one million cheers*

Anyway, i think I've been real snappy these few days. Pardon me, those whom i've snapped at. I think i've got some major hormonal imbalance or something like that. I felt so horrible yesterday after shouting at my mum. What she did wasn't intentional, but those words just flew outta my mouth and i'm very VERY guilty. sorry. And yah JS... I'm really sorry too. Sigh... it just got on my nerves so much i had to scream. I didn't mean it ok? btw, i read it and i must say it's really quite funny.

I've been quite drained these few days with no particular reason at all. I actually collapsed on the bed at 9, yes 9 last night. And i was supposed to teach my mum how to burn her own cd but i had clean forgotten.

Oh yes something funny did happen today. I tapped lh on the right side and hid on his left side, but he didn't even react at all.... He didn;t even know i was standing behind him gaping in disbelief at his ignorance. Did he think that some fly landed in his shoulder and flew off or something?? coz if you ever read this, then hello i was the fly.

Now that there's no more internet at home, there's no more msn so it essentially means... there's NO MORE connection with tanya. SIGH!!!! somehow my mails can never get to her and she can't access this blog. i am upset.

5812

hmmm.... that was some code typed in by cher... great...... i see NO LINK. but nvm, cher's an eccentric girl. she just bloody whacked me.

here's the eccentric girl for you:
angie sux, i'm not eccentric!!!!!
my crush is cute (he;s not) asswipe.

See.. proves my point right. I gotta email mervyn now.

I think anne is probably still traumatised over the phonecall. hah. It was really quite funny. right anne???? *smirk*

Anyway, I'm in B11 AGAIN. Yeah.. waiting to go for maths remedial in about ten mins. Sigh! I still can't believe i was the only one who turned up for the run this morning. And so i thought he would have been merciful but no he still made me run like 6 rounds. mr khoo sucks. I went for a weight check though.. and *one million grins* calorie counting does help. hah... a bit la.. still a long way to go. *one million sighs*

Mr g didn't appear in school this morning, and thus all my efforts in resourcing all applicable data for his lecture today went to waste. Sigh.... and despite being given two free periods, i kinda wasted them. Talked to cher.. ate with her then clowned around with potato. Gee... by the time i got back to the reading room it was time for temperature taking. And argh!!! my bloody temperature registered a 37.6! I was bloody freaked man.

So, i know his name now and some other stuff. He's quite interesting after all.

crap, it's time to go.

Imagine having a girl sitting next to you and then suddenly she starts sobbing. would you get up and walk away? coz that's what some woman did to me.

I was so very upset this morning about everything that had happened. It didn't help that i had a good laugh abt lh before entering the room and no it wasn't mr wee's fault at all for my being upset, in fact he was exceptionally nice and supportive [to my surprise]. But yah it was more the after effects that left me bawling my ass off.

It doesn't bother me very much about the fact that my com will be taken away from me and that i can never chat again. Well at least i can still access from school. The thing that left such a scar on my sour-ed heart was the fact that he said he didn't understand why the school had to get us so involved in the various cca's and it just hit me so hard i went all limp and got off the car feeling all rotten and bruised.

Well, at least it explains why he had such a irritating black face whenever he picked me up from rehearsals. And if i was late for one minute he would blast my ass off. Even as he picked me up from the CO concert i got blasted just coz they had arrived and i was not out yet. Such a small matter and yet it could be blown to such proportion. I take my hat off to him, and basically, the way he drives the car is absolutely horrid

[continuation]

The Co concert was fantastic. I liked the soloists parts and some of the ensembles.. Mimi and grace did well. very well indeed. Just that when they all played together there was a little lack of coordination. :)

Anyway i didn't even concentrate much during tuition today. After which i met up with mimi and talked quite a fair bit before coming home. and yes, i had to lie about that, making my tuition teacher sound like some wheee.... saint coz he didn't charge me for the 'extra time' put in. Sorry, but i really needed to talk to someone so thus the lie. Oh yah but we had a purpose also. Then i came home, took a short nap and completed half of my assignments. I'm not upset anymore, actually i'm trying to find something in life that will keep me sane.

You know, if this entry doesn't go up tonight i'll be very upset as well. Coz blogger always does this to me.

I had quite alot of things to say but now it's all vanished. sigh.

omg it's 12. So HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANNE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh sorry it's HAPPY BIRTHDAY MRS M___ IR______!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! aheehee.... sorry hons.. just had to do that.

alright that's about all for tonight. My last night. *sobs uncontrollably* I do lead a VERY sad life.

You know, i typed this really nice and long entry about JS and the love of his life, the curly hair girl whilst waiting for the talk yesterday, then poof! power cut. Then hui's hp starts ringing and she starts screaming in the class. funny...

Anyway, the human geog test this aftternoon was an ultimate disaster. I counted my time wrongly, and as a result, i didn't even conclude. It's like when he came in and said 3 mins more, i just panicked like crazy, and scribbled the last of what i could think of. Sigh.

I think singapore can be renamed 'suana city' or something. The weather has been merciless and i'm practically drowned in sweat by the time i reach home everyday. I hate it. Funny thing is the fact that it's bloody hot outside, then when we enter B11 or the ava it's friggin cold. What's wrong with everything!!!!!!????

It has been such a bad day today. *kills myself* I still want to punch potato's other eye though. hah. could have succeeded, but he had fast reflexes. damn. Btw, his new name is officially known as lucas potato quek. Why? coz of his uncanny resemblance to lucas quek of the 26th student council. Wait, i should say, a potential candidate for the 26th student council.

Gee... there's a bloody econs test tmr and i absolutely dread even having to open that damn book. I do not want the test tmr. Not when there's american idol tonight! And it's the bloody finals somemore. till 12.. wtf.

I so want to cry now. everything is seriously wrong today. half my entry has dissapeared and i'm feeling VERY VERY sore. to hell with everything.

I'm at my mum's office once again making use of the com. hah. Was to lazy to take a mrt and walk home so i came here instead. Don't know why, but i feel real real sleepy. *yawn*

It has been an extremely hot day today. I wonder how cher survived the trip home on foot. Gee... holes in your shoes yet?? Something big happened in my block yesterday, and i'm proud to say i was part of it. Actually, it was more of coz i was super k-po that's why i got involved. But at the end of it all, i still do not know who the real culprit is. Both the 15th and 16th floor seem equally suspicious, i'm boggled. BUT, if they ever throw any damn thing down again, that's it man.Anyway I was very entertained, very very entertained throughout the entire confrontation. I actually threw all my homework aside just to go up and witness the entire thing. My mum now calls me a 'bhat-po'... sigh!

Stayed back in school to collect the econs and geog notes but ended up leaving only at 5. Sheesh.... coz after collecting the notes su borrowed 7 bucks so i waited for her to return the money.. then had a very long talk with mimi.. went to photocopy more stuff.. walked over to talk to dot and ended up being the main topic. argh.. yeah more 'alexis'....and before i knew it, it's bloody hell 5.

So i drag myself here, and shall do my math tutorial before going home.

Things to do when i get home?
1) essay outline for human geog test
2) review theory of income and employment determination.

There is always a need to plan. hahaha... reflect and plan for tmr ain't it? Well, it's the new motto for A51.. and i'm jolly well gonna stick to it.

Omg blogger is so bloody irritating. Is there any way that i can make the post come out at one go instead of in parts. It said that the entry was too long. What the hell.

There is one more shot to be taken before i send the film for developing. The whole film was dedicated to drama and only drama pple. haha.. wow. I think i'll use the last shot to take a pic of my chicken mask. We'll be getting our masks this coming week!!!! *grins* Hmm.. it's actually quite redundant to keep it at home, but i want it anyway.

Let's see what happened yesterday.... firstly, the matrix reloaded was wheee.... a blast. I got a little lost here and there coz i didn't catch the first one, but overall it was good. In fact, very good i'd say. I drooled till no end coz he was so bloody cute. When he first appears, *start drooling* then he fights, *drool somemore* and then he kisses, *faints*. That was basically the sequence.

[continuation]

So we had lunch at mos burger, trodded around here and there in plaza singapura then took a train down to buona vista where embarrassing situation one occurs. He arrives, and i blush like crazy. Don't know why, maybe the weather was hot, maybe it was stuffy there, maybe it was fuelled by the multiple 'omg angie he's here' teasings. argh.. you know how easily i blush anyway. Thank god he went down.

Then we take a bus to mr smith's house, and it's gorgeous. There was no one else on the bus anyway, and it felt like a sort of field trip. hah. Anyway back to his house.. It's like one of those houses form the old biritsh colonial times. very cool. But, there were alot of mosquitos, and i'm scratching like a monkey here. *damn*

Brought my camera(the super bulky underwater one where some pple thought it was fake or some toy) and snapped away. *glares at cher* Then comes embarrassing situation no. 2. I'm sitting on the chair, shiying on the rocking chair next to me, and he is standing next to shiying. So cher gladly takes dot's camera and says come take picture! Shiying nicely runs away, i start to make an exit, when jason pushes me back down into the chair. He settles down into the rocking chair and we're forced to take a pic together. *kills myself* I think if you looked at the photo you'll probably think he took a pic with a tomato in disgusting clothes. Ended up telling him oh yeah this is all a set-up. They've been planning it ever since b.c anyway. crap.

[continuation]

Anyway the food was pretty good.. But couldn't eat much coz of the mos burger we had. Most of the time i walked around, took pics, read some mags and talked. Oh yes and played with hugo of course. That dog is huge, but very very friendly and fun to play with. Mr smith has such a pretty daughter!!!!!! I looked at her pic, and went omg! drooling to the core! only to turn around and find mr smith directly behind me going er... what!?? yah.. *blushes to the highest degree* And he has a very nice and cosy study room area back in the garden. Sigh.. it's such a pity that the govt may have to take this piece of land back to build some biomedical stuff.

Before we knew it, it was time to go back already. Didn't wanna miss the last bus. And ironically, it so happened that only him and i crossed the road to the other bus-stop. He was going there to take a bus whilst i waited for my dad. You guys must be wondering what happened right? Well, nothing. hahaha... It was quite awkward at first... Then after that it was alright la.. Talked a bit about bball then his bus came. NO, there was no hand in hand thing anne... you can wait for the longest time ever and it'll never happen. You guys are seriously nuts. We do not like each other and that's it. NO use trying to pair us up. We can only be friends and nothing else.

Jason... still crazy over neo's coat and shades? hahaha.. *knocks his head* Be practical comrade. Where the heck are you gonna wear that to? besides B11.. You know, i thought that his name was neal all the while, till i read anne's blog. hah. *hangs head down in shame*

And everyone looked really good yesterday. Dot looked real slim, no need to do calorie counting my dear! She has no tummy at all and super slim arms. What more could you ask for? And sarah... in the super mini skirt.. grace and her sexy look and shiying and her nice-to-touch top. hahaha... nice. everyone looked real nice. Cher and jason had matching shirts. haha.. and i divorced jason.

This has to be the longest entry ever i suppose. the washing machine just beeped so i shall stop here and go hang the laundry out.

Alright... so i finally managed to change the colours here. haha.. took me one million years just to finish up the entire thing. Thank god my dad didn't come back till real late last night.. I think he would have grumbled till no end. The scary thing is that he grumbles silently, but not scream, so it's like silent-killer kinda feeling that gets instilled. *damn*

Oh man i LOVE small little holiday breaks like this. Can wake up super late in the morning and just laze around in bed, pull up the curtain and read a nice book, reply a few messages.. before going to brush my teeth. No one to come nag at me to get my lazy butt outta the bed, and no one to scold me when i use my leg to open the window. muhahaha... I absolutely adore mornings like this.

The drama celebration party thing is in two days. Rumaged through my wardrobe and irritatingly, i can't find anything suitable to wear. argh!!!!!!!!!! I'll probably end up turning up in some please-kill-me clothes (as usual). It's really funny, coz when you're shopping it just seems so bloody nice in the shop, then when it lands up in the closet the appeal just drops drastically. Then, shove it aside. Gotta get out of this idiotic attitude.

anne!!!!!!!!!! I guess you're probably shopping at suntec now. haha... I really did want to join you... sigh.. but no parental consent so next time ok?? As they always say... aiyoh angie ah.. after your exams you can do ANYTHING (ya right?) you want..... we'll see abt that. Oh yes and i think aaron chose helene in the end.. but they broke up like four months later. i think.. haha.. can't remember who told me that too.. but yes i love gwen too!!! She's darn sweet.

Good thing that has happened is that my dad has become much nicer coz my mum has gone to kl. hahaha... I was quite taken aback when he told me he didn't mind waiting for me to get a haircut. *smiles* But i shall wait for mimi.

Happy vesak day! .

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! to my one and only gorgeous grand-mama.

Well, i should have been there in KL to celebrate her birthday, but sadly I'm too lazy to have to go through all the hassle of temperature taking at physics lab 4 for ten friggin days. I don't wanna miss school too. Lectures and tutorials are crucial nowadays. Miss one and that's it man. Oh yes speaking of which, i wanna do my napfa as well. hah. Can't believe it bloody hell rained last friday and killed everything.

I'm sure they had some i-want-to-devour-all cake just now too after the dinner. sigh... i want some too!!!!!! haha... Kl's cakes are seriously much better tasting than those here.

Was supposed to go with mimi to get a haircut tmr but she ain't free. And my dad won't let me go to town so i can't join cher and dot. How bloody sad, coz once again i'm left stuck at home trying to figure out some geog or econs or math. *rips hair* Or maybe i'll be nice and scamper off to my dad's office, use their resources. and photocopy econs notes for some of my classmates. We'll see.

crap. the first week of my diet fell entirely FLAT. god dammit.

Oh yes, my parents are finally talking to each other again. I don't think the matter is really resolved though, it seems like it was an acumulation of ALOT of things that led to that small flare-up.

sleepy TO THE CORE.

Great, so i decided after all that i should just stick with this template and be boring. The other one's been pissing me off coz i can't move the shoutbox. the imood thing dissapears.. and blah blah.

Oh gosh.. today has been so draining. So many things have happened, i think i need some time to just think things through and come up with a new punch line that can get me through tmr. Some things have been good whereas others haven't. I don;t know what to do. If only someone could just teach me and tell me what i should do coz things are really not what i want them to be. Sigh. I'm not in a position to say anything, much less help to solve the problem. The thing is it's a accumulated thing that cannot be resolved in one day or just by saying sorry, which i doubt neither of them will anyway... so HELP!!!!!

Alex probably thinks i'm a freak.

Tuition has been ok today. Except that he had a runny nose and it was quite erm.. gross. But oh well i understand three-d quite thoroughly now. *beams*

I shall do my econs essay outlines now i suppose.. I'm actually dlding some songs for my mum. figured that was the least i could do for her at a time like this. She didn't even enjoy the nice meal we had *my treat* at the japanese restaurant just now. sigh.

And mimi.... *wink!* [ sorry just had to do that ]

Wow. for the first time ever sice the ice ages, we are in the same chatroom again. haha... I love chatting with my sis and kel. It's just so... refreshing! We're like pure idiots here thinking of names to insult each other. gee... example. my cousin is called kelly tan bee suan. so initials = ktbs.

She said it stands for kelly tall slim and beautiful. *pinches nose in disapproval* I said it stands more for kelly toad and with small boobs. Gee.. my sis came up with keep touching small boobs. Major pervertic man.

It's been quite a good day today. Managed to get some assignments done, and HAPPY MOTHERS DAY to all lovely mothers!!!! hahaha.. hui said yesterday that her mum gave her flowers i think.. and said well i figured i wouldn't have been a mum without you. awwww.... ain't she the sweetest? Sadly i didn't get anything for my mum. Guess i'll just be treating her to dinner soon. *grins*

I really need NEED to go on MAJOR diet. It's not a want anymore, it's a NEED. Anyway good diets to offer? I guess i'll try the beehoon soup but don't drink the soup one. And hope i don't barf after a few days. hahaha... *go angie go* The diet has to work this time. I've been procrastinating abt it ever since b.c. all the psycho-ing abt it's ok being a fat girl must come to an end. It is NOT ok anymore. Well.. let's see how long i'll stick with this plan. *snort*

It's time for a shower before embarking on the acjc paper. *yawn*

alright!!!!!! i finally changed my template!!! It looks almost the same as anne's though. sorry hons.. the rest were just too ugly.

I just can't seem to get the shoutbox to move up though.. someone help PLEASE!!!!! and how come there are funny things on the top of each post????? and an felt daze at 3.47 pm? where did that come from? aaahhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *calls out for dot*

Anyway, i had quite a fruitless day today. Sigh.. managed only to complete less than half my homework and review my three-d. which i still suck at.. I just can't picture the whole thing... messy topic man.. Physical geog is also half complete only. *damn* Oh i completed letters to both janice and eileen though. *smiles* they were long overdue.

i need sleep. this template thing is absolutely dricing me nuts.

At my mum's office now waiting for my dad to come. And my legs feel real jelly-fied. The 2.4km run was a real strain. I mean having not run for one million years, then suddenly oh hello... run 2.4km... ok basically, i nearly died. I never liked running anyway in the first place. We've gotta do the five items thing tmr too. argh!!!!!!!!!! The only incentive : get it over and done with asap so that i'll never have to go for pe again. I HATE PE.

The com here is so cool. hahaha... as in it works five million times faster than the one at home... wheee!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway, i so totally screwed the human geog tutorial up just now. Somehow i feel so intimidated when i ask or answer mr g. It's all in his bambi eyes i suppose... i stuttered for god's sake. gee.... "c-c-capital" was what i said. sounds like mervin huh? haaha... no offence. *smiles* Somehow every geog tutorial seems to be a disaster. I never ever manage to sum up the courage just to say any point i have in mind. *rolls eyes*

Hmm.. i seriously hope the chinese orchestra got at least a bronze for today's syf. They have worked hard for it anyway. good luck!! Oh well, it should be over by now.

Btw, i nearly had a heart attack whilst watching wheel of fortune last night.... i was practically hopping up and down coz i knew the answer to the last bonus round puzzle, and the dumbass on tv didn't. gee... he waved goodbye to the grand prize of $100,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *stab stab* it was like this _is_p_n_ and the clue is place. One look at it and i knew it was fishpond. *rips hair*.

And yes, the most stupid thing i did today. Dropped off at the bus stop outside alexandra hospital, waited for 176 which never came... looked at the thing with all the bus numbers, and realised there was no 176. *stabs myself* i swear it used to exist at that bus stop. it couldn't have existed in my imagination right? So i ended up dragging myself to the bus-stop outside safra, and nearly missed the bus coz i was day-dreaming. yeah i'm stupid.

Alrighty.. my dad should be here any moment. And i can assure you it won't be a smooth ride to the club. He's always finding fault with anyone or everyone. We do have a gorgeous car yes, but all ruined behind the hands of the man. Plus point for him? he keeps the car real spick and span.

That's all then. I'm bushed.

finally. FINALLY i tell you. blogger has been so bloody irritating. or maybe it's just me being super irritated as of late. I'm looking at my progress record, and feeling all lost and fu**ed up once again. And so, mr wee says... angie is still some way from showing she can cope with her studies. She needs to review her study strategies and her priorities.

So run a knife through my skin now and i won't feel a thing. Still some way... intepretation: a long long long way away and will never get there. Scenario in the kitchen goes like this.. angie.. you MUST really work harder.. we so cannot afford to send you overseas you know???? how can i bloody hell not know? It's been drilled in almost a million times, and I'm almost up to there with all this. I AM working harder for god's sake. I can't help it when things turn out like this, coz i really did put my heart and soul into the exams. It's just the blanking out at the crucial moment that shatters every single blooody thing. Fine.. form now on, no more slacking sessions in the cafe... the reading room has now become the place to be at almost all the time. just find a corner and start pushing things into my brain.

Anyway, yes the play was a huge success. Almost everyone who went said it was good. *grins* And i'm sure we all enjoyed it on stage too... sigh. i am really gonna miss all those drama mamas like crazy. They were indeed a very fun lot to be with. I'll never forget kala's oh-my-godness-gracious-eeks!-ahh....-ooohhh!-super-duper-diabetic love story. It's just so..... fairytale like. *wallows in self pity* hah! and thank you SO MUCH.. for all the gorgeous flowers.... they are now sitting nicely in a vase on my table. *hugs*

And my mum has seriously gone quite bonkers. lemme re-enact what she does like every hour or so. *stands at the door* angie! what's up doc! *punches her own chest* what's up doc!? yah... no prizes for guessing where she got that from. Randy jackson.. hmm.. is jackson his hind name btw? And it looks real silly but i can't help but break out in hysteria.

My first math tuition thing today was alright... at least there's ready help now!!!! He's like a real genius. gosh.. doing architecture, and three more years to go before he gets his honours, then one more year to get masters, and two years in practice before becoming a real architect. phew! and i kinda thought he finished uni.. but actually he's just having a break. I think the fees are a little hefty though. *damn*. And i asked such a stupid qn. *punches myself* i asked.. am i your only student? how insensitive.

Ok it's back to work now. Have a zillion things to do once again.... and the icq thing keeps blinking. *no. resist angie resist.* reading room mode remember? farewell!

I think i have just about one million butterflies in my stomach now... and still counting.

*rips all my hair out* We haven't had a full run of the bloody play yet. and it's bloody hell tmr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The technical stuff was inevitable, but we took a hell lotta time to figure that out and sobs.. I feel really insecure about the whole play. I'm so afraid that i would trip over one of the sheep's legs, I'm so afraid that i'll fall off the box or worse, fall straight through the stage coz it's hollow below, and I'm so afraid i'll trip when coming down those high boxes. I so do not like the way things are going now. I find it so bloody hard just to move about, and we need speed here. With limited vision, how the bloody hell are we supposed to achieve speed!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!!!!! Can i just bawl my eyes out and hope it'll calm my heart down or something.. there are so many things to take into consideration when we're on stage and i'm getting so nervous even before the audience starts to filter in. *feels faint* i can't bring myself to even imagine surviving tmr.

is this what's supposed to happen before a performance? or maybe it's just me. I so want it to be a huge sucess coz we've never done anything this big before, and even though we're performing for a crowd that's half the size of the orientation one, somehow the butterflies in my stomach have reproduced rapidly. I think maybe it's coz we were damn prepared for that orientation one.. and it was impromptu acting so it wasn't so bad. We have to remember every single line now and when your turn to say something comes, suddenly there's just this insecurity in you, a lump starts to form in your throat, and you hope desperately that the line will just bloody come out. omg i am SO SO scared. I need a BIG assuring hug. *calls out to shi ying*

continuation....

Anyway my jaw nearly touched the ground when ruben was sent to the bottom two. My immediate reaction was oh god.. if he's out i am so not watching this ever again. Trenyce didn't deserve to be out. josh did! crap. And the wait for my parents after rehearsals at the UCC were so traumatising. With miss k shouting into the phone at either the taxi driver or some person at the taxi company, I was so grateful to have issac there waiting for his parents too. Would have died if i was along man.. There was this point in time when she ended the call and said fucking idiots, and my heartbeat sorta accelerated to giddy heights. She basically, scares the shit outta me. Issac said he was immune. haha.. *amused* I'll never be immune.

And argh... I'll be at the UCC bright and early at 0815 tmr! Guess i'll just do some readings whilst waiting for the rest to arrive. Oh yeah and the cheese prata shop at pasir panjang serves the best prata ever!!!!!!! The special one which i ate had potato, cheese and egg. *heavenly*

Better get some rest then.. Don't wanna get caught sleeping behind the mask tmr. God bless the play.